Bye Bye, George

I was in the local dive
when the President walked in.
We talked,
but not about politics.
He said something
about a banana having
a good youth form.
I was like
Good youth form what the hell is that.
He said about how
a horse could have a good youth form.
We really just shot the shit.
It was fun.
I always figured it would be.

No, I Didn’t Hear That One

knock knock
I don’t care who walks into a bar
or who’s there
or how many so-and-so chickens
                      it takes
to screw in a lightbulb
or what the lawyer said
to his shoe or what religion
the shoe was
                      I’m not waiting
I’m not waiting who
for the punchline
of that joke you’re supposed to tell
                      all dirty
and when a phone rings in the bar
& is Jacques Strappe there?
           I’m crossing the road

and you shouldn’t have to ask me why

I was Group A

pretty bumpy en route
not the only ones gone to dallas
george dub, too
short flight, 33 mins

cold in dallas, dallas love
a place to wash me hands
pop some 'cedrin
head is cabin-pressurized

my hands: scraped
spilled myself at intersection
walkin the whole way home
leaving a classic message
then writing gibberish mail

count the drinks, count em
on both hands
without all digits, i'd be short
one dogfish, two dogfish
bus comin—half a dogfish
real ale phoenix esb
cigarettes and a phone

over to a bar onn fifth
a jack, a coke, a band and waiting
hey, there is someone i know
beers for them
where's the group leader?

there he is, says, "car bombs"
consensus says, "OK"
half a pint of guinness
(you can chug it)
and bailey's goes down easy

no drink service on this flight
coulda used some water
parched, dessicated, husk of self
carcasse void even of lions
clipped from sky
like a headline never written:
i arrive on time

time for another beer
let's move on
time for some dancing
wristbands and a cigarette

forty bucks for jaegerbombs
the guy next to me gets three
i double that
but can't unload the sixth
maybe god drank it
before he kicked my ass
in the form of a friend
handing me what was it?
some anonymous shot

goodnight everybody
good night for dancing
who's gonna dance with me?
i told a guy we should
brokeback dancefloor
but it didn't come to that
i worked up a sweat
doing the faux salsa

when did I leave?
don't remember
barfed a little
turned off my phone
woke up to the sound
of the handyman
mowing the lawn,
two hours late
for my flight.